this is my month.


it was a literal wake me up when september ends. haha.


i woke up at around 9pm. and ate my dinner.



actually, gutom pa nga ako eh. might have been a very light dinner. but i was eating so many.



argh.






or maybe, ganto lang ako paggabi na.

im waiting for amazing race season 12 to finish downloading and imma watch the first three episodes. :D

i forgot to put PSP on my wishlist.


but, anyway, it is totally forgivable.




i am real sleepy now.


i only had an hour of sleep. all day. :(



pero it was all worth it.

my birthday is 6 days from now and i am writing my "wishlist":

1. friends DVD, 10 seasons
2. gilmore girls DVD, 7 seasons
3. 7th Heaven DVD, 1st - most recent season
4. New CPU

• sira kasi video card nito. so walang use yung bagong bili na video card

5. new Phone

• Nokia - 5320, 5610
• Sony Ericsson - W3801, C702
• Motorola - RZRV9, ROKRE6

6. Harry Potter DVDs, Books 1 - 5
7. Harry Potter Books, Books 1 -7 (hardbound)
8. Paolo Coelho books

• The Valkyries
• The Fifth Mountain
• By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept
• The Zahir
• Veronika Decides to Die
• Like the Flowing River
• The Witch of Portobello

9. Forrest Gump DVD
10. new contact lenses
11. New Shoes

• new training shoes for volleyball!
• Adidas - Vintage Sprint, Adistar 2000, G.S.
• Puma - Usan (White), H. Street NC, El Rey Perf
• Nike - Air Rejuvenate LE Medal, Air Heritage Max ID (Florida, Idaho, Texas), Air Edge TR LEA

12. Mikasa Volleyball ball - the one they used in the Olympics yung violet and yellow. so cool!
13. The Looking Glass Wars Trilogy by Frank Beddor
14. 20 color STAEDTLER triplus fineliner set
15. Laptop

• VAIO TZ Series
• Dell - XPS M1330, Inspiron 13
• MacBook / Pro

16. a new water tumbler
17. replica jersey of the Serbian Volleyball team
18. digicam - hindi SLR, hirap dalin eh

• Kodak V1073, M883

19. complete set of Bob Ong books

• A B N K K B S N P L A Ko?!
• Alamat ng Gubat
• Macarthur

20. Amazing Race DVDs, Season 1 - 12
21. Survivor DVDs, Africa (1st) - Micronesia (16th)
22. a new trash bin
23. larger computer table

24. get all of my preenlisted classes in CRS






25. world peace

i totally forgot about having the IE150 exam on tuesday. akala ko next week pa.


oh well. it was good that i can grasp the concept well. and mind you, through reading only, i fared very well in the second long exam.




anyway, imma study now.

as of now.



i am facing my last week of being a 19-year-old.




:)o

i am a fan of reality tv.

one day, i would like to set foot on the mat as Phil Keoghan tells me that i am part of the first team to arrive. or be greeted by Jeff Probst before settling myself in a remote place for 39 days. or rather, be ushered into this house and stay for a 100 days. or be asked by Howie Mandela if it is a deal or a no deal. better yet, conqear my fears as Joe Rogan hands me a check for $100,000.


i would want this to happen in the future.


my opportunities became clearer as i heard of the news that GMA would be fielding in the Filipino version of the popular American series, Survivor.

Survivor for me is the show that started it all. running for 8 years and 16 seasons now, it has been the longest running reality tv show i have known.

i was really looking forward to the location and the castaways. also, i was thinking of the ways how they could turn this Survivor series into our own. but, they could have settled for the original format and i would not complain.




but, things went different as i perceived them to be.

for one, they made the show run every day of the week. the original Survivor is shown once a week and covers the whole 3 days. one week of Survivor Philippines covers 3 days.

that was as boring as hell. you have filler episodes for tuesdays and thursdays. the challenges would run on monday and wednesday and tribal council is shown on a friday.


this is just like PBB Outdoors.

they could, might as well, change the name from Survivor to Pinoy Big Brother: Thailand Outdoors.


that just sucks. i dont want all the arguing crap. i dont want it to look like PBB.

but that is just it.



i might as well go back to watching the original as Survivor: Gabon - Earth's Last Eden is showing.



another, they do not have a diverse set of personalities. i know that there are different types of people but looking at the castaways, you know who's in and out of the crowd. you know who they are going to rely on. you know who are strong and who are push-overs.

unlike the original Survivor, we have different types of people.




i just cannot say just how frustrated i am. i love the series. but, i do not love it enough to bear GMA's production.

it was just Pinoy Idol over and over again.

the decision was not thought through.

however, 110 pesos later, we were wandering our asses off the streets of Los Baños.





we were there to cheer for a friend. and was not expecting anything out of the experience.




anyway, i did.




and i hope that it would be an annual affair for all of us.




let's go UP Varsity Swim Team!

im'ma update today. because i feel like it.



i was thinking about ranting earlier.


but now, i do not.





anyway.






the sobrang pangit morning turned out to be a beautiful day.


good karma for me. :)




im going to finish my reaction paper regarding the field trip.

i feel so lost of words.

i cant remember anything.

or maybe, im just putting my mind into a completely different thing.

it's a good thing that we're done with the report. i can take that off my back for now and worry about the final paper later in september.




even though we're done, i cannot deny that i am still down.

heartbroken may be a bit exaggerated.

depressed is not the right term.



its just that i am down. or i have this heavy heart. or i cannot put my mind into things worth putting my mind into.





i am a wee bit tense because of the things i've been doing these past few days. i have not been holding back and i am slowly regretting it.

they say that you can only get the things you do not have by doing things you have not yet done. i've done that. and guess what, i still went home empty handed.

or maybe, the ride isnt over yet.


but, anyway.


so, we are back to square one, eh?




early this evening, crunchyroll took my mind off things. i was happy watching these japanese / korean / taiwanese / chinese / filipino series and movies. they did the magic for the first three hours. but everything past that was disaster.


it was good thing, too, that im done with heavy academic load. or else, it will really suffer. and, i dont want that. this is one of those times that you cannot control the emotion you hold inside. spilling it out does not help either as you go looking for more emotion to fill the space left by the emotions you poured out.


this is such a heavy phase of life and i should always take note to be able to cope with this.

i cannot do this in the future.





whitney houston is a good companion at this time of the year. thank you whitney.


can i start my life all over again and be a different person?

 
im so nervous about tomorrow's report.


it's not that i am not ready but, i am afraid i might say something that is not right.

magaling si sir. marami siyang alam. i learn a lot of things from him. pero, it comes to the point na nahihiya ka magimbento ng sasabihin mo. pero, its ok lang na ma-correct. pero, standing in his presence and talking about art, you better say the right things.



yun lang.




tutulog na ako.




oo nga pala. i did it. sinabi ko na.

pero di ako nagpakilala. haha.